Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
