I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
