ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah, but the likliness of me finding my husband at a party where the facebook event is titled "NEW YEARS EVE SHIT SHOW" is highly unlikely
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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