looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
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