dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Randomize
