is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize
