I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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