I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Randomize
