Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
