Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
wait.. the condom broke. ehh whatever i think im already 2 months pregnant
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
