Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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