There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
