he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
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I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
No more vodka shots for you. Last night you begged a man on your knees to sell you his beard. He had no beard.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
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I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
You don't make any sense
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If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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