I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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