I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
