Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Randomize
