She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
Umm... How do I tell my roommate someone shot a speargun through the wall? On a side note, cliff shot a speargun for the first time.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize
