Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?