If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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