We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Redeem this text for a blowjob
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
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