my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
