Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
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