Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
Randomize
