I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Randomize