maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize