my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Blow job season was short but glorious.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize