I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Fucked Zombie Jesus at a Halloween party. I need Plan B before I give birth to the Antichrist.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Randomize
