hell yes lets make some ravioli
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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