3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Life is so much better after having sex.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Randomize
