k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Should I be offended if he asked if he could use saran wrap to eat me out?
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
I wrote myself a note last night telling me to tell you that you're the best person ever, and asking you not to tell me what I did, I think I'm trusting my drunk judgment on that one.
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
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