my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
During sex he wiggled his hips and said "I'm turning the ice cream" Deal breaker?
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Just peed off a cliff while playing white snake on my phone. Close enough?
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
