My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
