He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
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