yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
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