just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Judging by the amount of alcohol multiplied by the amount of her exes here, tonight will be ending in tears.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
I rewarded myself with Taco Bell tonight for going a full week without punching my roommates in the face or wishing bodily harm on them.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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