did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
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