Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize
