The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
Randomize
