If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
You better wipe the dick of your lips before you come smoke this blunt.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
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