its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize