Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(616): View more from Michigan

I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.

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(616): I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does. http://tfl.nu/4jqf

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(253): View more from Washington

I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.

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(253): I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then. http://tfl.nu/hci4

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(404): View more from Georgia

your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona

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(404): your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona http://tfl.nu/j0d8

Replies (24) Good night (603) Bad night (3198) Order T-Shirt
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(781): View more from Massachusetts

what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?

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(781): what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to? http://tfl.nu/2zz0

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(315): View more from New York

he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...

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(315): he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear... http://tfl.nu/9by5

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(630): View more from Illinois

I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat

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(630): I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat http://tfl.nu/13uk

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(904): View more from Florida

I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.

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(904): I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck. http://tfl.nu/gj91

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(641): View more from Iowa

Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.

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(641): Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in. http://tfl.nu/co4b

Replies (16) Good night (4039) Bad night (958)
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(608): View more from Wisconsin

The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high

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(608): The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high http://tfl.nu/8rya

Replies (4) Good night (1420) Bad night (412)
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(707): View more from California

I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs

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(707): I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs http://tfl.nu/07a7

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(773): View more from Illinois

I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.

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(773): I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day. http://tfl.nu/c735

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(815): View more from Illinois

High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...

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(815): High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes... http://tfl.nu/ssal

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(518): View more from New York

Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.

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(518): Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk. http://tfl.nu/lrcf

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(540): View more from Virginia

You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.

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(540): You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you. http://tfl.nu/4u5p

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(415): View more from California

I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.

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(415): I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided. http://tfl.nu/izkw

Replies (4) Good night (970) Bad night (187)

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