last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
