Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
I've decided that my new worst fear is that I'll end up on "I Didn't Know I was Pregnant"
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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