Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize