Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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