one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize