I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
She bit a glass in half.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
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