last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
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