He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize