somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
According to my dad, my tongue ring makes people assume I give a lot of blow jobs because, as stated by him "that's what it's for"
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Randomize
