There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I pulled my tongue muscle last night. your welcome.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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